Tipology of attitudes includes five categories that ilustrate widely the features of communication between people.

 

1.Interpretation refers to verbalization and interpretation of the reasons of others’ actions. Within this kind of relationship, the person who is interpreted is hierarchical situated in an inferior position and has the risk of developing a dependency or aggressiveness if this person refuse to become dependent. In the case of a correct interpretation, communication has the biggest chance to be obstructed, because defending mechanisms are unleashed. Nevertheless, there is a way that leads to an interpretation that do not block communication and this way is to formulate in such a manner and in a moment that won’t affect discussions, in a moment that find the companion prepared to accept and assimilate what he is told. As a conclusion we can state that this attitude is not recommended because it leads to a broken communication and only in some very good chosen moments, that uphold the other person’s interests, the possibility of helping and constructing a good communication is given. We are talking about the others’ interest because interpretation is one of the most confident means of manipulation that is able to completely direct the other person’s speech into an expected direction.

 

 

 

2.The second attitude can be defined as a negative or positive evaluation of people. Assessing means judgement and this attitude is also based on a difference in status between communicators and also is going to lead to a dependence of the evaluated person or to aggressiveness. We are tempted to think that a negative evaluation of interlocutors conduct to obstruction while a positive evaluation is good. In fact, the person who receive positive assessment has the temptation to respond positive but at the same time has a wrong orientation to select from other opinions about himself only those that correspond to what he want to hear, in order to receive only good assessment. Finally we can observe that any evaluation of a person, either negative or positive, will hedge the possibility of an authentic expression.

 

 

 

3.Another ineffective attitude refers to questioning, which the same, it is a conversation where a dependence take place. The one who is questioned is dependent and could amplify his tendency of waiting for questions. In this way this person won’t be motivated to express information based on personal and spontaneous opinions but on those facts that are suggested, expected or claimed by previously given answers. Questioning is one of the most powerful form of manipulation because it canalize speaking in a certain direction, avoiding questions that wont suit to the interest of investigator. Also we can say that the questioning reflects the profile of the person who asks and not of the person who gives the answers. Using certain words instead of others, like affirmations instead of negations, could triggers emotional reactions able to change the nature of answers. The order of questioning is also important, as it influence the way a person who answers organizes his/her answers. We can say that successive questions are based on induction and influence and less on spontaneity. As many questions are addressed, as the other person’s point of view is less genuine and inconclusive expressed.

 

4.Counseling or helping is that sort of attitude which expresses much more interest in the person someone talks to and consists of finding and proposing solutions that he has or has not asked for. This is another relation where the differences between the advised person and his advisor could establish dependencies, so that the possibility of self problems solving is reduced and the recommendations received creates premises of manipulation. The most inefficient counselling attitude is the attitude of appeasement, when listening does not take place and encouragements move communication in a direction of neglecting the other’s experiences: “it would be fine somehow, you’ll manage!” This is a hidden form of aggressiveness. A beneficial attitude of helping and counselling is a consequence of communication and not a starting point of it. This attitude is efficient and apposite only later on, when the speaker has been offered the conditions to express and assume his own problems.

 

 

 

5.Comprehension represents the attitude through which a person shows interest in what the other person says. Listening has the purpose of understanding, with no intention of judgement or manipulation. Comprehension involves a reformulation which means to completely and accuracy say again what the other person said with no bias and no meaning distortion, in order to stimulate and encourage the other’s statements and deepen your personal understanding. This attitude creates a dependence relationship but this time the person who listens is subordinated. It is the only attitude able to ease communication because allows a real interest in other’s situation. This person wont feel like being questioned or evaluated even not judged or manipulated. In stead of this, the person you talk to will receive the possibility of deepening own feeling and reflections.

 

 

AS a conclusion we say that the optimum communication case, the one during a person feels like being real listened and for that he can express his own feelings and thinking, is the attitude of comprehension and reformulating, which are the best solution to reduce at minimum any threatening, to maintain a high level of communication. Spontaneous reflection, interpretation, questioning or offering support won’t facilitate authentic statement of the person we want to understand and communicate to.